My dearest baby Sia Yun Xuan Kieran is born on 10 Oct 2011. A wonderful date, isn't it?!
Haha.
The whole delivery process goes like this:
Early morning, hubby and I woke up for breakfast as usual. Rainy day and Hubby said rainy days are usually lucky days for him. He has a feeling something good will be happening today!
Hubby received call from the company he went for interview at and he was informed that he is offered a placement. He called me to talk about handing in his resignation and asked if there's any sign of labour yet. I said no. No bloody show, no nothing. I'm still at 38 weeks 4 days pregnant.
I went to take a short nap.
10.30am, while lying down on bed, resting, I heard, or rather felt a "pop" sound below, somewhere at my lower tummy. A few minutes later, I felt warm gush of fluid there, much like period coming.
Heart pounding, I rushed to the bathroom and saw my pantyliner stained with pinkish liquid. Washed and saw clear liquid with some blood stains flowing up continuously.
Called hubby and asked him whether he has tendered. He said yes. I told him water bag burst. He was shocked. I told him I was very frightened and nervous. He asked me not to be afraid and asked me to call my doctor and my dad immediately. Dad will come to drive me to hospital.
Dr Ho's clinic nurse asked me whether the flow of liquid is a lot. Its trickling but not a big gush. So I was advised to go to the clinic first. We did a fetal heartbeat test and Dr Ho checked the dilation. I was already 3cm dilated! I was like huh, 3cm and I felt no contraction?
He sent me to the labour ward. I didn't have anything except breakfast at 8am in the morning. Dr Ho said it's better not to eat anything in case an emergency surgery is necessary. When I'm in labour, I won't feel like eating anyway. A nurse in his office is so kind to give me a pack of biscuits. My parents, and hubby are with me. My parents in law are on their way. I couldn't believe it. My water bag broke at 10 Oct 2011, exactly the date I wish he will be born. My little angel!
I was so nervous when I went to the delivery ward. I was told to change into the hospital gown but leave the back unbuttoned in case I need epidural which needs to be injected to my spine. The nurses are so friendly and kindly answered my questions. Their calmness made me less nervous and afraid.
I'm so glad hubby is with me throughout the whole process. I am lucky to have such a loving and supportive husband.
The contraction was really painful. It started soon after I lie down on the bed with IVF inserted. I am relieved the anasthesist finally came and injected epidural. One painful insertion of the needle and one rather painful insertion of the catheter and then there's no more pain. I used the laughing gas because I thought it can help me alleviate the pain but the gas doesn't have much use. Gripping hard on the handle of the laughing gas pump helps though.
Then we waited another few more hours. Dr Ho came to check and said its still 3cm. My contraction isn't strong enough to dilate the cervix. He ordered the IVF medicine to be increased and within 1 hour, my cervix was dilated another 4 cm. Soon, the nurses came and said they want to prepare for delivery. Lucky that I used epidural. Hubby said the scale went really high up during peak of the contraction.
Then, I was 10cm dilated. Dr Ho came and told me he is going to deliver the baby now. He will use a vacuum but he still need me to push. I couldn't feel anything there after the epidural but the nurses and dearest hubby encouraged me to push when I should. I pushed not so hard at first. Then with their encouragement, I pushed harder and harder.
We heard baby's cry and there! My darling little angel Yun Xuan is born!
I immediately felt my stomach went "down" and the nurse put a crying little baby on the cloth on my chest. I was amazed and I really am not sure whether I should touch baby or hug him or what... My hubby is so brave! He watched the whole delivery process and see baby's head emerge from my vagina. He said baby came out facing side ways.
Then we watched and took photos of little Yun Xuan while doctor stitched me up. After that, Dr Ho informed me that I will feel pain a few hours later when the epidural wears off. Little did I know that the pain would be so intense that I couldn't sleep at all on day 1! Dr Ho came to check the stitches on the 2nd day and told me that besides the episiotomy, I also suffered a larger tear on the right side because my skin was too delicate. That explained the long time he took to stitch me up.
The lactation consultant came on the day after delivery to teach me breastfeeding but I couldn't do it well because the wound hurts so much! Most of my energy is gone to bearing the pain of the wound. I called hubby early on the day after the delivery to ask him to came to hospital quickly, I need him as I was feeling so extremely painful.
I love my little darling. He had jaundice on day 3 and his bilirubin level went up to level 14. So I stayed one more day to accompany him. I tried to breastfeed him as best as I can and to relieve his agony of taking off all his clothes and going under the phototherapy, I asked the nurses to feed him formula milk if he cried too hard. Then the next day, he level is 11.5 and the doctor said he can go home. Babies can go home if they are below level 10 but the doctor said he can go home but we must feed him well, make sure he passes urine and stool well and he has some sun bathing in the morning between 8-10am.
I really love my darling baby. Now, he is suffering because his bilirubin level is still high, he keeps sleeping and sleeping, not waking up every 2-3 hourly for feeds. My breasts are engoarged and I really really want to feed my little darling like I did in the hospital. I don't know what I should do. I'm at such a lost. I just want my little darling to get well as soon as possible. If he don't get enough breast milk, his bilirubin level will go up, and I can't bear my darling baby doing back to hospital again. If he needs to be admitted, what should I do?
He's not feeding well like other babies. He just kept sleeping. I'm useless at waking him up.
I was miserable that I was crying since this afternoon. Thinking of my little baby suffering makes me cry more and more. Other people around me showing concern made me cry even more! I just hope they would just leave me alone so that I can spend time with just me and my baby and I don't have to feel terrible with people disturbing me when I feed him and I don't have to bother with unwelcomed advices. I just want my hubby to be beside me, talking to me, reassuring me, caring for me and telling me baby and I are just going to be fine.
I hope everything goes well for my beloved and we can be happy again.
