Love and advices

I was reading some sci fi stories of time travel. I wonder what an older me will advise the now-me. I wonder what I will advise my then-me if I could travel back in time. At this point, I do not wish to change anything about the past because my present is so lovely.

I will probably tell my then-me to save more money, don't splurge on those pretty and "feel-good" spendings that will end up as accumulations of materials in my home, and which "feel-good" factor doesn't last for more than a day at most. I will tell my then-me to try to really understand my parents instead of judging them as always being critical of myself. I will tell my then-me to persevere and that the worst and the best days in life will always be over, but the present is always the most important. I will tell my then-me that in future, I will realise that when I thought I understood and treasure life, I had in fact not understood anything about life, and not deeply felt the need to treasure it until I have my own children. Life is precious because of them. I learn to think deeply before I do because I do not think of only myself now. I think for my husband, my family, my son, my daughter, our future and our destiny together. A mother always put herself and her needs as the lowest priority. Before I become a mother, I glorified the sacrifices of a mother. After I become one, I no longer think in this way. To put my loved ones before myself is not a sacrifice, it is the most natural thing to do. If it is most natural, there is nothing to glorify. As children we accept it and we pass it on to elsewhere in the world, and we do greater things with the love that was given.

Life has a lesson. To be loved and to love. Although each of us learn it through a different way, the essence of love remains the same.

Life in Singapore

This week, everything is so much better. Hubby has taken few days off from work and he is trying to spend quality time with me. It is really heartening to see hubby trying his best to care for me.

Yesterday was tiring because as usual, we ran around to settle renovation issues. Reno is a big spending so we want to spend wisely. Furthermore, we need to be more prudent with spending as baby is arriving soon. More expenses to come!

Seriously, with the high standard of living and the cost of giving birth to and rising a child in Singapore, I cannot imagine surviving if there is more than one or two kids in the family. Rising one child is already very expensive and time consuming for working parents. There are lots of liabilities for working adults. Our flat is one big liability and the flat is not my asset, and neither does it totally belongs to me. HDB leased it to me for 99 years. So it puzzles me why they send me a bill for "Property tax" for a property that does not belong to me. That's not all, SP services (monopoly provider for water and gas) has started collecting money even before we move into the flat!

Today, I went to Tampines to buy dinner at peak hours and the crowd scares me. They don't seem to have eyes totally focused on where they are walking, and some people are always in danger of bumping into me so that I have to walk extra carefully and be very mindful of those people whose souls are lost somewhere while they are walking. Don't want baby to be hurt in anyway! Hubby's friend said that she had left Singapore for one year to live overseas, and comparing Singapore this year and last year, she is shocked to see the sharp increase of people taking public transport this year. Public transport and stations are much more crowded than last year. The large number of people, together with the unpleasant rushing, squeezing and zombie-like faces added stress to daily life. To us, we may not have noticed the difference but to a person who has left and came with a year's gap in between, the difference may be so extreme that its hard to ignore.