Caitlin has bad tooth enamel that encourages decay

The dentist told me that Caitlin's tooth enamel were badly formed, that is why she gets cavities easily. Badly formed enamel already has lots of pits that trap food. Sigh.

What we can do now is to brush her teeth twice a day with fluoride toothpaste and at night, we let the toothpaste with fluoride remain on her teeth, and dap a bit of fluoride toothpaste on the cavities. And also, we have to wean her off the night feeds (she can't have fluoride on her teeth and then drink milk right?) which I have already done when I found out that she has so many cavities. Fluoride therapy, the dentist said, would delay the progression of decay until she is old enough to go through the procedure for filling. The brown spots will not go away but will not get deeper, and some beginning decay may remineralise.

Badly formed enamel... that never happened to Kieran. He has nice teeth although two of his molars had decay which were filled. Being experienced with dealing with tooth decay with my older child, I was very diligent with brushing and cleaning of teeth for Caitlin, my second born, so why does the decay still happen? Why was her enamel so weak and badly formed? I'm agonising over these questions. So I did some research.

Breastfeeding mothers does not need to rush to wean their babies off night feeds to prevent decay. In fact research has shown that breast milk can protect baby's teeth from decay. Unfortunately, research has also shown that night nursing exacerbates decay if baby already has cavities. A lot of factors goes into baby tooth decay. It could be genetics, medications mother took while pregnant and affected the formation of baby teeth, mother's health while pregnant with baby, presence of bacteria that caused the decay (the sugar bugs) and of course parents' diligence in brushing and taking care of babies' teeth. I've read that antibiotics caused weak tooth enamel. I'm avoiding antibiotics for my kids unless absolutely necessary. I had a very serious episode of stomach flu that required hospitalisation and strong medication while I was 8 weeks pregnant with Caitlin and I thought that might be the reason for her badly formed enamel. Every time I brush her teeth, or see her smile, and see those cavities, I say sorry to her. I'll take extra good care of her teeth now. I hope she won't have to go through too extreme restorative dentistry work that requires GA, and I certainly pray this won't affect her permanent adult teeth.

Read more about weak tooth enamel here.

17 months and still latching on!

My little boy at 17 months old used to hold my hand and guide me into a room, saying "Walk nat, walk nat, walk nat..." when he wanted to latch on to drink milk milk.

My little girl at 17 months is now holding my hand and guide me into a room, saying "Milk, milk, milk..."

Super cute, these two little ones!!!

Caitlin is reaching the toddler milestone in a month's time, and she is very healthy, very active, talking a lot more words now, and she has been saying "milk" all day, demanding to be latched on.

Caitlin's First Step!

As of today, Caitlin is 15 months and 24 days old. Today, she just took her first step! She has been trying to stand and walk by herself since last month and today, she has finally done it! Hurray! Baby steps but our guess is that before the end of the week, she'll be toddling around the house!

We went to Changi Airport Terminal 3 to see the Disney installations. Here's Caitlin at the T3 Kopitiam (where there's vegetarian food stall! Yeah!) drinking from her sippy cup by herself.

Caitlin looking cute!

Kieran looking cute!

Enjoying home cooked kway teow and mee, cooked with love by daddy. Even when going out, we make sure the children have healthy home cooked meals. We bought a good tumbler (保温壶) to keep the food warm.

Little Caitlin is also developing well speech wise. 

Here's some of the milestones reached.

Motor skills:

• Great hand eye coordination. She picks up tiny objects from the ground with great expertise. We just have to make sure she don't put them into her mouth.
• Can cruise around the house.
• Crawls well and now learning to walk. Can take a few steps unaided!

Speech skills:

• Calls mama, ah mah, papa, gor gor (calls him da da)
• Tries to vocalise "ah gong" but can't say out.
• Recognise and says bear as "Bah"
• Recognise many objects like apple (she makes a eating gesture), rabbit (she jumps), lion (she roars), cow (she moos), goat (she says baa!), fish and bird (she makes kiss gesture to shows she loves them), flowers (she says "hua"), stars (makes twinkle twinkle gestures with hands), sun (sings ah ah ah because I sing 太阳公公 whenever I point to the sun), moon (she tries to say "moon").

Although Caitlin's speech development isn't as fast as her gor gor's, she's quite on par with children at her age. Jia you, Caitlin! It's such a joy to hug this little angel close to me everyday, smell her pleasant scent, kiss her soft cheek and feel her soft hair everyday! And she's so loving. She will kiss my cheek and daddy's cheek. She's not as milk milk addict as Kieran was before but she definitely loves her milk milk. She still nurses a few times a day and every time to sleep. She wakes up several times at night to nurse. But I'm not complaining. Co-sleeping helps very much in getting enough sleep for me, and she soothes back to sleep easily with nursing. Her favourite person is mummy! Who else can provide food (milk), comfort, fun all in one?

One thing I notice about play in Caitlin that is very different from Kieran, is that when she is given an object like a ring, she will put it over her arm and wear it like a bangle. Kieran will never attempt that! It's a girl thing, I guess? Haha. Children never cease to amaze me :)

Injured Nipple! - Nursing My Fierce Girl

I was dozing off while nursing my little girl when she suddenly got frustrated and gave me a vicious bite!

I have never had such a bad bite from nursing Kieran! She literally bit down and pulled! I screamed in pain while she cried in fright, and thereafter, I stopped nursing her on the injured breast. In fact I developed such a fear of latching her!

The nipple hurts terribly and I stopped latching her on that side, only latching her on the other, and hand expressing the injured breast when it got too engorged. At night, once, I latched her on the injured side as I did not want the supply to go down too badly, and that latch was excruciatingly painful! I took care to unlatch whenever I felt baby was fussy, or when I felt her teeth. Caitlin was definitely teething and very often, she would attempt to bite me.

I got so demoralised that I contemplated stop breastfeeding her altogether. Caitlin refused bottles since she was four or five months old, but I refused to nurse her and gave her a bottle, and she actually drank 30ml of breastmilk from it.

Later, I realised that Caitlin was not only teething but developing a fever. That explained her crankiness and her likeliness to bite while nursing.

Now, it is two weeks since she recovered from her high fever and roseola (fake measles) and she has resumed her lovely, nice, non-biting self, albeit a little fierce when she's refused the things she wants. Oh yes, she bites you when you snatch her toys. It's almost like a reflex action from her. She instinctively lunge forward and bite your arm if you snatch her toys. She reminds me of a puppy! Haha! But she has stopped biting me when she nurses. Thank goodness!

Breastfeeding, the second time round

Well, I didn't write much about my breastfeeding journey with Caitlin before because its really so easy. There aren't much ups and downs, and the previous breastfeeding journey with Kieran has already proven that, yeah, I've got milk, and much more than I could ask for, so I don't expect many changes this time round if I follow all the rules I did before, except to over pump as I want to avoid over supply.

To prevent over supply
I belong to the lucky group of mummies who get lots of milk, fast milk flow and an over supply problem very quickly. Or maybe its not because I'm lucky but because I breastfeed my bubs diligently ever since they are born. Latch on within an hour after birth, breastfeed baby by latching on demand, not afraid of sacrificing sleep, rest, other activities etc, just feed and feed, and eat lots of food, and drink lots of fluids. The rule of breastfeeding is simple to me. Don't think. Just feed. Many mummies sabotage their own breastfeeding initiatives by doubting their supply, and went on to pump out milk to check how much they are feeding (inaccurate measure by the way), stress over how little they pump out, attribute almost all baby's symptoms to "not enough milk" like baby cry after feeding = not enough milk, baby tummy too hard = not enough milk/ my milk not good enough/ my milk is very gassy/ etc, baby don't take long naps = don't drink enough milk/ milk not fatty enough. I'm not saying these cannot be the reasons but there are just too many things wrongly blamed on our breastmilk. By adopting the "just feed" idea, mummy gets relaxed, baby get lots of milk, and both are happy.

I'm also lucky this time round really because Caitlin is second born. She gets 2 advantages. Firstly, mummy is more experienced. Secondly, nobody really bothers to fuss over every little detail of baby and nobody questions whether mummy can breastfeed because after all, mummy has breastfed the older one for 20 months.

But one of my problem is over supply. That tormented Kieran and I for many months. I was determined not to get this problem this time. For the first and second week after child birth, I breastfed by latching baby totally, no pumping at all. This worked well as Caitlin was just getting used to latching and there shouldn't be bottles introduced to prevent nipple confusion. I had milk since before child birth as I was breastfeeding my older child, so baby latched on and could be satisfied with lots of milk immediately. I felt engorgement by end of first week. This happened because of 2 reasons. Newborns are sleepier and thus she didn't drink as much as my breasts could produce. She finished with 10-15min on one side and then went to zzzz until about one to two hours later and I latched her on the other side. I allowed my breast to engorge without pumping and make use of cold cabbage leaves (only once a day) to relieve it. I use this sparingly and only with very painful engorgement because over using can result in reduction of milk supply. Other times, I applied cold compress. By third week, baby was drinking on both sides of breasts instead of one, which means my supply has dropped such that she required both breasts to satisfy her demands. She took about 15-30min one side, and fell asleep after latching 5-10min on the other side. It was about the end of third week that I felt baby might feel that the breast milk wasn't enough because she was fussing more at the breasts and I did not feel engorgement anymore. My breasts felt soft but when I pressed, there are still lots of milk. I decided to pump once a day, to bring up supply slightly and also to train baby to feed on bottles. I used Tommy Tippee and Pigeon (yellow wide neck type) and baby preferred Pigeon so we stuck with this. It was also during this time that baby got fussy evenings and growth spurt, so this was a really cranky time. Luckily we survived that ordeal! Phew!

I stored only very minimal amount of milk a day when I do pump. That is because over pumping will bring up too much of my supply, and I only need to store a few packs of milk as emergency. When I go back to work, I still prefer to give my baby fresh milk so I will pump enough to feed baby for the day. As for why I pump at all to bring up the supply, that is because I don't want my supply to be "just right" for baby. If I have it just right, by the time I go to work, work stress, traveling and the lack of latching may reduce my supply and "just right" can become too little milk. Call me kiasu but I just want to be sure baby gets enough milk. Haha.

To teach baby to take both bottle and breasts

My older child refused the bottle when I introduced it to him at 3 months. We tried a few times at 3 -4 weeks and he was ok with it but we didn't offer it anymore for 1-2 months and gave it to him at 3 months. No matter how we tried, he just refused it. Remember I had an over supply problem? So all the frozen breastmilk I stored had gone to waste. The only way he will take breastmilk was from my breasts. But that's ok coz I'm a stay home mom. Problem is, I couldn't leave baby to go anywhere more than 3 hours. Stuck with the babe! This time, I must let Caitlin learn to drink milk from a bottle because firstly, I intend to go back to work soon, and secondly, I do need to bring Kieran out or go out to run errands which may take longer than 3 hours. So, we took care to feed Caitlin from a bottle at least for one feeding a day. The daddy is happy though. He gets to feed his precious little girl. In fact sometimes he would insists on feeding her. We continued to give her a bottle a day to ensure she can continue to be used to bottle feeding. Few months later, we relaxed it a little and gave her bottles only when I needed to be away. That added up to about a few times a week. In the beginning, when she was fussy, and refusing bottle feeding, we gave her bottle feeding after a bath when she is both happy, alert, and thirsty. She drank up. And now she could drink from the bottle no matter whether its grandma, grandpa, daddy or mummy feeding her. But still, she drink from the breasts most of the time, because I still jealously guard this precious moments of bonding with her.

That's about all for now regarding breastfeeding.

Caitlin is latching very well and she's a very smart little girl. We just took her for a photoshoot. Can't wait to show the pictures here!

Update on 23 October 2014: Little Caitlin is now 14 months old and she hates the bottles. She giggles when she sees the breast and excitedly crawls over for a snuggle and milk milk time. She can take the bottle though. When I was away, caregivers managed to get her to drink from it but she hates it. Wise choice, I think.

Baby Caitlin

People say that when one child is a high demand baby, the next one would be an easy one. How true is that!

Kieran drove us mad the moment we brought us back from the hospital. First, the sleepiness and refusal to wake up for milk milk, then his incessant crying from 6pm to midnight during fussy evenings.

Now, I was surprised how much easier it is to take care of Caitlin. No wonder some people said taking care of newborn is easy. When I had Kieran, I found this saying ridiculous. How could it be easy. There could actually be easy to care for newborn in this world. Haha. Caitlin is a darling. She sleeps most of the time and yet wakes up every 2-3 hour for milk milk. Sometimes she sleeps more and wakes up 4 hours later. Sometimes she wakes up every hour for milk. But every time, she will guai guai finish her milky and then go back to sleep. She burps whenever I burp her and she regurgitate milk but not as much as Kieran does last time. Kieran "merlioned" his milk out. But I must say its partly my fault too coz I pumped too much and created an oversupply problem. My poor Kieran had to bear with the fast milk flow, hard breasts and had to cough when the flow comes as its too fast, and regurgitate more due to the oversupply. Its all my fault. This time, I am smart enough to treat the engorgement issue by not pumping, and using cabbage leaves once a day, and cold compression and massage in between feeds. By 2nd week, my breasts are no longer engorged, and I still have lots of milk for Caitlin and she's drinking happily. But I still have fast milk flow and she coughs at times but its not too serious. How do I know I have lots of milk? I tried hand expressing a bit of milk when my breasts feels too full, especially when Caitlin didn't drink from that side for the feeding session, and the milk sprayed out like last time when I pumped for Kieran. I tried not to pump until next week. Don't want to start stimulating too much.

Caitlin's poo also turn mustard colour by the second day after discharging from hospital and its just like what the book says. She also has a little bit of jaundice and tested 10.2 at Dr Ong's clinic, but Dr Ong said its not high, and the level will eventually come down as long as she feeds well, and output is good. Her output is not worrying at all. She wets 6-8 diapers a day, as stated in the book for a healthy baby and she poo a lot of mustard poo poo everyday too.

She's our text book baby. And we hope she remains so easy to care for!

By the way, she slept through the night for two nights and then last night, she woke up at 2.40am for milk and diaper change. Not sure if she'll sleep through the night again. But that's not important. Most importantly, dear Caitlin must grow up happy and healthy, and smart, just like her gor gor. But of course she'll be smart, with all the nutrients from mummy's milk! I'm determined to give her 100% total breast milk until she's 6 months and for as long as she wants thereafter! Just like with Kieran. Hmm... maybe I should ask Kieran if he wants to try sucking milk milk today... I noticed that its no longer colostrum but full milk already. Will he still accept milk milk?

Made in school

It was Zhong Yuan Jie which is the time when Chinese remembered the great Poet Xu Yuan who gave his life for his country. When I brought Kieran to school, they were telling stories about Zhong Yuan jie and the let the children make dumplings. Kieran brought a small dumpling home and I later let him open it and eat it on his own. I hope he had fun that day :)

Father's Day just passed. We had a great time with dearest daddy. Yun Xuan love daddy so much. He made a nice handicraft for daddy at school! Teacher Lina said he used his fingers to dot the paints onto the tie of the "shirt" and use cotton bud to put glitters on it. I asked Yun xuan whether he did that himself and he said yes. This is daddy's first Father's Day gift from our boy. I told Yilin he's very fortunate. A dad is a son's first hero and a daughter's first love. He is now both a hero and a first love.

By the way, Kieran is officially weaned off mummy's milk milk since 6 June 2013. He breastfed for 20 months. I have the urge to continue to latch him on every time! I love the feeling of latching him and watching his chubby little cheeks as he suck hungrily. It is a way of telling me my baby is still a baby and has not grown into a boy yet. But oh well... I've got to stay firm. Maybe I will reintroduce it to him after Caitlin is born and see if he still accepts it... hehe.

weaning off milk milk

I'm in my 29th week now, and its really time to get Kieran used to sleep without milk milk (latching on to me for breastmilk).

As my breastmilk supply decreases, Kieran does not really ask for milk milk anytime in the day. He drinks formula milk with a bit of milo for added taste. We added milo so that we can coax him to take it as milo and not a replacement for his milk milk, and indeed he takes to it and requests for milo about 3 times a day, and each time 160ml in the morning and 120ml at other times.

But he kind of already associated milk milk with sleep time, and my nipple becomes his pacifier. They can't supply him much food anymore but it works great as a soother for him before he goes to sleep. That is good for him but not good for me! Imagine after giving birth to Caitlin, I still have to nurse Kieran to sleep! I'll be doubly exhausted! So, its weaning off milk milk for the afternoon naps and for night feeds for now.

Kieran couldn't get used to it and started to say "No no no!" and cried when I told him, "Come. Sleepy time, but you must sleep on your own, no milk milk."

I tried to sleep beside him and pat him to sleep but he couldn't get to sleep despite being super tired, so he tossed and turned and cried angrily, even attempting to pinch and bite me if I tried to comfort him. So we have to try another method. Hubby carried him and calmed him down by telling him he will show him the stars (glow in the dark stickers in our room) and then pat him to him as he carried him in his arms. This is not an ideal case as our intention is to train him to go to sleep on his own on his bed. But since he couldn't yet, we just had to settle with this for now. At least we wean him off breastmilk now, and then try to go to the next step which is to get him to sleep on his own.

Kieran's Childcare centre has 4 cases of HFMD since opening. Its a new centre. I'm glad the principal is very open with us regarding this. I checked Kieran's hands today and was worried to find a blister on his palm. Hubby and I discussed a lot about HFMD, I did a lot of research and reading on it, and we thought about how we should deal with it if it really happens to Kieran. The complication is that I'm pregnant now and we know in 3rd trimester, although HFMD will not cause miscarriage, and will not easily pass on to adults anyway, there may have a chance that the newborn baby will get it. And we are also worried that in future, Kieran may pass the virus to his sister while she's still young. After observing for awhile, we decided that it shouldn't be a blister but a mosquito bite because his usual bites look like that, and if its HFMD, he should be having more than one blister. I checked his feet. They are fine. He's having dry and peeling skin on his palms and feet though. I think maybe the antiseptic hand sanitiser the centre uses is too drying for his skin. I've stopped using Kirei Kirei hand wash for him at home too, and uses his body wash to clean his hands. Hopefully the peeling will stop. I also applied some moisturiser on his feet before he sleeps today.

Poor Kieran had to cry so much these few days. Cry during the morning at the school gate coz he wants mummy, cry during the afternoon when he can't get milk milk for his afternoon nap, and cry at night when he can't get milk milk before he sleeps. Oh yes, he also has a old time habit of waking at about 3-4am at night to suckle on the nipple for a few seconds before he goes back to sleep. So now, he still wakes up at 3am to toss and turn. For the past few nights, he can toss and turn for a while and then goes back to sleep on his own but yesterday he was banging on the door and wanting to find mummy for milk milk! Hubby who now sleeps with Kieran instead of me, carried him until he sleeps and then put him back onto his bed. Let's hope tonight will be better, and he won't wake up in the middle of the night but sleeps through!

Kieran is eating a lot lately and has grown quite chubby at his cheeks. Teacher reflected that he could eat a lot at school, and when he returns home, its non stop eating again!

My heart aches whenever I send Kieran to school. I hope for one day when he will tell me he enjoys school and then my heart will not ache so much. Today he did painting with his hands, and music lessons, and he told me he played with cars (he usual favourite). Teacher showed me pictures she took of him doing the activities. She said he's getting better. I do hope so! This week, he started to accept showering at school which is great. I'm glad to know he's improving much. Just hope to see him tearless when I bring him to school and when I bring him home. Now, I'm keeping him to half day schedule. I don't really want him to stay too long in school as I know sleeping on the mattress which will only be washed once a week, will increase chances of him getting viruses which may threaten my unborn baby, and he hasn't really learnt to sleep on his own yet, so it will be lots of unnecessary tears for him if he has to sleep on his own at the child care centre.

That's all for now... Back to sleep time. Super tired! Tomorrow is another trying day...

Blog Revamped!

With the introduction of new blogger layout, I revamped my blog and gave it a fresh new look. The template design stuff is pretty user friendly and idiot proof. Hahaha.

I need to explore it further to see what further customization I can do to it.

I've added in a "Page" call "Breastfeeding" at the side bar for links to information regarding breast-feeding within and outside of my blog.

Tomorrow, hubby, baby and I are going on a staycation! First staycation with baby! Diapers? Check. Pyjamas? Check. Baby food? Check. Favourite toys? Check. Camera? Check... Lots of stuff to pack when we bring a little baby along with us! But the best is I don't need to worry about milk and warmer and bottles. He still hates the sippy cup, unfortunately... haiz... the only way he wants to drink milk from is from my boobs.

6 month old

Kieran is 6 month old and Kieran's mummy is now looking for opportunities to work part time.

There's this part of me that tells me if I go back to full time work, I will be able to see a stable increase in my bank account again and I will be able to buy lots of nice stuff for baby, and I won't think twice about bringing baby to enrichment lessons... but I always pull myself back, telling myself that if I do that, I will be like most working mummies, having to work many hours, OT, many stresses, having to leave early in the morning, leave baby to someone else's care and come back late in evening, sometimes too tired, hungry and stress to play with baby and take care of baby. I do not want that at all.

Oh well, I shall see how this works out. I'm trying out several ways of earning income and sustaining my life as a stay home mom. If all else fails, I will have to go back to full time work. I cannot stay home all the time because even though hubby is ok with it, I think he'll be stressed with the burden of a growing baby.

So I'm considering teaching art which is my love, teaching tuition to lower primary school students in English, Maths or Chinese which I have experience doing as an undergraduate, or I can teach part time in Childcare as unexperienced teacher (I wonder if they will accept?), or I can make handmake stuff to sell online, or I can import maternity and babies' clothes and other stuff to sell online. I'm also interested in importing organic baby foods to sell.

I've also written to the BMSG to become their volunteer. They'll contact me to attend the training. It'll be fun and I'm so proud of breastfeeding journey with baby. It's totally rewarding and exciting although its really tough to begin with.

Oh well... so many things to try out. Haha. Life is fun :)

Blocked ducts

My goodness... I've a blocked duct. There's white blister at my nipple, and super painful hard lump on the right side of my left breast. Hurts like hell when I hold baby and he pressed against me. Hurts like crazy when I feed him on this breast but I know I must bear with it and keep feeding him on this breast in order to clear the blocked duct. Some people recommend using a needle to poke the blister but I won't want to do that! Sounds pretty scary... I may get my hubby to do that for me. Gosh...

Confinement Sleepwear

Front Open button sleepwear suitable for confinement use, hospital wear, night time wear and for breastfeeding baby at home. It's not too hot because its cotton. This material is better than the silky type of blouse which cost around $40-60 at major shopping malls. I tried both kind. This one is more comfy and easier to breast feed. This is good for breast feeding as you unbutton easily. The side pocket is also convenient for you to put stuff temporally as you hold your baby. It's only $9.90.

Even after confinement, I'm still wearing it at home. Hehe.

Edited on 21 April 2012: The price of this sleepwear is actually $9.90. I wrote $15 previously. Recently found out that I mixed up the price of this one with price of another sleepwear that I bought.

How to store and use expressed breast milk?

How do I store EBM?

Expressed Breast Milk or EBM can be stored using a breast milk storage bag, a plastic bottle or a glass bottle. I stored mine in Avent bottles like this:

Label them with the date and time you expressed out the milk. I also store them in glass bottles given by hospitals.

It is recommended that you don't store too much milk in one big bottle because when you want to take it out to thaw, you'll waste the milk if you do not need to use so much of it at one go.

My friends also get free glass bottles from Mount Alvernia before they discharge so that they can store breast milk in them. I got mine from a mother I knew in the forum. We buy plastic caps for the glass bottles like the ones in the picture below from Mount Alvernia pharmacy. You can only get them in hospital pharmacy.

The Avent bottles can store up to 180ml while the glass bottles can only store up to 120ml. Remember to leave a gap and not to fill the breast milk to the brim because breast milk, like all liquids expand when frozen and the bottle may crack. One of my breast milk overflow the bottle and broke the cap when it is frozen.

How long can I keep the EBM?

Here's a simple formula to remember how long you can keep EBM:

In freezer: 3 months

In fridge: 3 days

In room temperature: 3 hours

If baby already started drinking the milk, use it up within 1 hr, although some websites say we can leave it to feed for the next feed. In hot and humid Singapore, bacteria grows more quickly.

Do not re-warm, or re-freeze breast milk that you took out to use and don't put used breast milk back into the fridge.

How to heat up the EBM?

No, you do not heat it up. You only warm it up! So do not boil it or use hot water to pure over the bottle.

To use the EBM, if you take it out from the freezer, put it in the fridge to thaw. Do not thaw it outside at room temperature. It takes about 12 hours to thaw completely so do remember to take it out of the freezer one day before the day you need to use it. After it is completely thawed, the EBM can be kept in the fridge for another 3 days.

After taking the thawed EBM or freshly expressed and kept in fridge EBM out from the fridge, put it in a bottle of warm water to heat. Remember not to boil EBM or use boiling water to heat up the EBM. High temperatures can kill the nutrients in the EBM. We should use water at 40 Degree Celsius. I usually don't test the temperature to exactly 40 Degrees Celcius. I simply take a cup of warm water, pressed out from my water flask, and test with my hand that its not too hot. It should not have steam coming out from it, and it should not scald your hand when you touch it. Then I place the sterilized milk bottle with EBM into the cup of warm water. After the water has cooled and the EBM is not warm yet, I press out another cup of warm water, test it, add cool tap water if its too hot, and then warm the EBM again. I repeat this again and again until the EBM is nicely at room temperature. Actually if you ask me, I'd rather give baby EBM that is too cold rather than too hot as baby may be scalded.

Also, the contents of EBM, when stored in fridge will separate into layers. Swirl the bottle a bit before warming and feeding.

Breastfeeding FAQ

These are all that I've learnt about breastfeeding and I want to share with every mother!

1. Help, I don't have enough milk for my new born! I only managed to pump out a little bit of yellow liquid :(

Don't worry! When I was in the hospital I only managed to pump out a little amount of yellow, sticky liquid called colostrum. This early milk is high in antibodies and very important for your baby. Allow your baby to latch on as often as possible to get as much of these colostrum as possible. In a few day's time, your milk supply will come and the milk will change from yellow colostrum to more whitish transition milk and then to white colored milk. Don't worry if there seems to be very little for your baby. Baby has reserve in his body for 3 days so even if you do not have milk yet, it is ok for baby! Just keep latching baby on to stimulate your breast to produce milk.

The below is a picture of the colostrum I pumped out while at hospital.

This is a picture of the full milk I pumped out when we went home. This totally white colored milk only comes in a week after discharge.

2. I use the electric pump to pump out my milk and only get 30ml! That's not enough for my baby, right?

Using a pump to measure the amount of milk your baby is drinking during breastfeeding is a very inaccurate measure! Your baby is much better at extracting milk than any good breast pump in the world, so baby can actually suck more than the amount you pump. Also, when you feed baby, the feelings of closeness encourage let down of milk and its different when you pump, so the milk production will be much more when you are latching baby directly.

People with fast milk flow can fill up the bottle quickly. People with slow milk flow may take some time to fill up the bottle. But that still does not mean you do not have enough milk for your baby. Baby is having enough output, wetting diaper 6-8 times a day, looks satisfied after a feed, and is gaining weight means you are feeding your baby well. Just persevere on and you'll be glad that back then, you never give up!

3. Should I just express out my milk and feed baby with bottle? Direct latching is so difficult and feeding takes so long.

Don't do that yet. Don't choose to feed expressed breast milk (EBM) in bottles just because breastfeeding is difficult. Personally, I think babies should be introduced bottles only when mothers need to be away and cannot breastfeed her directly, like going to work, or going off somewhere for longer hours. Latching my baby isn't easy. He was a sleepy baby due to jaundice so we had to keep waking him up to feed and had to keep him awake during feeding. He's also very fussy partly due to my fast milk flow and his fussiness caused me to have sore nipples, blisters, and bleeding. During the first month, I really felt like giving up. Whenever I thought of the feeding session, I cringed as I am reminded of the pain on my nipples. However, I told myself that I have to persevere and be positive. With the encouragement of friends and my hubby, I have persevered with direct latching.

The most important reason one should do direct latching as much as possible is because this is the best way to stimulate milk production. Pumping cannot stimulate breasts to produce milk as much as babies' suckling. Most mothers I know have their milk dry up because they start exclusive pumping very early on, and there's almost no latching.

Another reason is that latching on provides the best bonding between mother and child. I feel happy seeing my child cuddle up close at my breast suckling, feeling safe and secure. I can cradle him and feel his warmth against my body, and touch him as he feeds.

4. Breastfed babies do not need to be burped.

Oh well, some say so but from my personal experience, yes, my total breastfed baby do need to be burped. He will swallow air when he cries or when he tries to search for nipple and is unsuccessful, or when he sucks and made clicking or sucking sounds because the latch is not very good. I have fast milk flow so baby is prone to unlatch and cry due to the flow being too fast for him, or make sucking sounds and have to be unlatched and latched again. Other friends who breastfeed their babies also say they need to burp their babies even though they do not have fast milk flow. So I guess the safest way is the burp baby after feeds. But don't over burp babies. Over burping them can cause them to spit out milk. It is not necessary to hear a "burp" sound after burping. Sometimes, there's just no air trapped inside so there's no need for baby to burp it out. (But if you bottle feed baby, you do need to burp baby until he burps because bottle fed babies almost always gulps in air.)

5. My baby drinks a bit and cry and pull off from my nipple! Sometimes, she pushes me away with her arm.

My baby does this most evenings since he's 3 weeks old. At first we thought he's frightened, what Chinese call "Xia Dao" by loud noises, noisy kids, etc so kept crying non stop and refused nipple even though he was apparently hungry and cried for milk. So we gave him Jing Feng San. And we also thought maybe he had gas in his stomach and gave him Ru Yi oil. Oh well, we came up with all kinds of theories and we were so at a lost of what to do. Then a good friend introduced me to this concept of CLUSTER FEEDING and FUSSY EVENINGS, and asked me to read Kelly Mom for more information on these stuff. Then I know! His behavior is not abnormal. Parents all over the world are experiencing this difficult moment.

Cluster feeding is when baby nurse more and for longer duration for a period of time usually in the evenings before he stores the energy for a longer duration without feedings, which is night time. During this time, baby may feed for a few min, then pull off, then feed then pull off.

Fussy evenings is when baby just simply fusses. Nobody knows exactly why baby fusses more in the evenings or why baby does it. There is something causing discomfort in baby but he can't tell us and we can't diagnose it. So what hubby and I do is we try everything! We rocked baby in cradle hold but he didn't seem to like it so we bounced him while supporting his neck and buttocks and he loved it. So we bounced him for hours. I bounced and sang to him for few minutes, then switch to hubby to bounce, then he started crying regardless of the bouncing and we knew he wanted milk so I nursed him and he pulled off and cried and nursed few minutes and then pulled off and cried again. These went on and on. Until about 12midnight or 1am... Sometimes hubby and I KOed and we had to hand baby over to my mother in law (who was doing confinement for me then) to hold baby while we rest. Usually when we hand baby to mother in law, he wasn't crying so much already.

There's one saying that during fussy evenings, even though what we do may not soothe baby effectively, it doesn't matter because what's more important is baby knows and feels someone is there with him when he's feeling distressed and uncomfortable. Someone cares. Someone loves him. Someone wants all the best for him. Someone is trying their best to make him happy and comfortable. Using this theory, I tell myself to keep calm and positive for baby. There was once I scolded him when he made me so exhausted and I couldn't forgive myself after that. It's absolutely silly of me. Baby doesn't know why he does the thing he does. He just wants cuddles, comfort and attention. So I tell myself never to do that again. When I am tired, I enlist the help of other family members when they are around and I take a nap or rest and do what I like to do. Then I go back with renewed energy and care for baby again. I tell myself that I must give all my heart and love for baby, no matter whether he fusses or he keeps crying or makes my nipple painful and sore, I still tell him he's the most adorable most important person to me, and I love him 100%.

Now, baby is 6 weeks old and everything is much better. Yes, the fussy evenings do get better although its not over yet. The fussiness actually peaked at 6 weeks and then stopped altogether when baby is 3-4 months old. The first month was the most trying. We just don't know how to deal with this little person who just popped into our lives! Baby destroyed whatever misconceptions I have about taking care of babies. I thought its just diaper changing, feeding, carrying... anyway, babies sleep most of the time, don't they? Alamak its not so simple and not so easy! If there's anyone who needs to teach their horny teenager a thing or two about safe sex, just come baby-sit my baby during one of his super fussy evenings! Those movies which glorified single parenthood? "Glorified" is an understatement! It's blatant distortion of reality! I can't imagine taking care of baby if I do not have hubby and parents or parents in law. I'll get really shagged and crazy.

6. I've a very sleepy newborn who refused to wake up for feeds, and when he does, he falls asleep quickly after nursing for a while!

I had the same problem because my baby had jaundice and jaundice babies are very sleepy. Those were my darkest moments. I became very depressed and cried almost everyday at about 5pm. Post-natal depression. I was also very possessive of baby, feeling unhappy whenever people, other than my hubby, hold him, and wanted to keep baby at my side at all times. I cried at every and any thing, including stories I read online, TV shows, News etc... even those stories that weren't even touching or sad and people won't usually cry at.

You just have to keep waking baby up! It wasn't easy. I had to tickle his ears, tickle his feet, touch him, talk to him, and my hubby read the news aloud to him so as to keep him awake, and yet most of the time, to no avail... yes, that's how frustrating it is. But we just keep doing it. The elders say, aiyoh, see he slept so well, let him sleep, no need to wake him up! But I refused to listen. I am one very headstrong mummy! I kept to the 2 hr feed schedule, sometimes changing to 3 hr feed if he seems to drink more during the previous session. I wake baby up every 2 hr, using whatever method we could think of or read about. Tickling, changing diaper, rubbing his chest, press cold towel on his face and chest... really whatever method. And I kept feeding him. We were delighted that during his 3rd week assessment, even when he still had jaundice, his weight has gained to more than the birth weight! Babies' weight should go back to birth weight by 1 month, and he's already much much better :) This gave me confidence and I continued feeding him with renewed vigor.

A certain pediatrician in Mount Alvernia told us to feed baby infant formula at night and to feed baby water because he has jaundice. Needless to say, I've stopped visiting this pediatrician and changed to a more breastfeeding friendly one. That one even told me to not be a hero, and that she had gone through this and she knows. Pui! I'm glad I never followed through any of her "advices" and persisted in total breastfeeding.

Total breastfed baby has jaundice that last longer but they will go alway. Mine only goes away slightly after his 1st month. Now, he no longer feeds on schedule because he can wake up for feeds already. He cries for feeds or sometimes, I see that he is awake and shows rooting behavior and feed him before he cries. My dad kept saying, let him be hungry for awhile and let him cry very hard before feeding him, then he'll drink more. But I do not see the necessity. Anyway, my baby feeds very well even though I don't let him cry hard for milk. I don't like to purposely allow my baby to cry. Excessive crying isn't good for babies' throats and babies with needs consistently ignored will grow up to become very insecure.

7. My baby keeps hiccuping. Can I give him some hot water?

There's no need to give water to babies when they hiccup. Its natural for them to hiccup and it goes away by itself after a while. Older generations have been advising me to give warm water to baby when he hiccup. Oh well. Some comments is 聽聽就好，笑一笑就忘了. But when it comes to my mother in law, who is doing confinement for me and thus caring for baby too, I am very firm about NO WATER for baby because I am doing total breastfeeding. Giving them water when they hiccup may choke them. See number 8 on why total breastfed babies do not need water at all. Remember to give very firm and definite rules to your confinement ladies and whoever helps care for him or her. Don't let them rule over you.

8. Does total breastfed babies need water?

The answer is NO! Many people like to suggest giving water to babies because they have been used to feeding babies infant formula. Total breastfed babies get the hydration and fat requirement from mothers' breast milk and that's all that they need. Feeding water to total breastfed babies can make them feel artificially full and they won't request for milk, won't suck more milk during feeding and thus may interfere with their growth. I've been breastfeeding my baby all the while and never giving him a drop of water. He's not dehydrated and he's growing very well.

9. What is total breastfeeding and partial breastfeeding?

Some mothers choose to give babies breast milk at times and infant formula or soy milk infant formula at other times. Usually they give infant formula at night so that baby feels "fuller" and will sleep for longer hours. Then mothers and confinement lady or whoever is the caregiver can get more sleep. This is partial breastfeeding. Total breastfeeding is feeding baby breast milk exclusively, with no water, no glucose, no infant formula as supplement.

10. Is partial breastfeeding better? I can get more sleep at night then!

Personally, I do not agree with this practice. Firstly, if you mix breast milk with infant formula, your milk supply may gradually dry up. This will lead to earlier weaning from breastfeeding. Breastfeeding works on a supply-demand basis. If there's less demand from baby, baby latches on lesser and sucks less, of course, your milk production will decrease because your body will send signal to your brain to stop producing more milk as there's no high demand for it.

Secondly, to feed baby infant formula makes him have a "fuller" feeling but that's not because infant formula is better! Quite on the contrary, its because infant formula is harder to digest. That's why when breastfed babies need to be fed every 2-3 hourly, infant formula fed babies only need to be fed 3-4hourly. Yes, caregivers or mothers get more time to do chores, and they get more sleep but is that good for baby? I'm not saying that infant formula is bad for babies but it definitely is inferior to my breast milk. I'm giving the best to my precious baby! Also, I do not think I should sacrifice baby's health just for my convenience. Not to worry, baby do learn to sleep longer hours at night as they grow older. That day WILL come. Anyway, some infant formula fed babies still wake up a lot over the night for night feeds so there isn't much difference in terms of the rest you get.

11. But if I breastfeed baby, its so difficult to bring her out!

No, its not! I've brought baby to shopping malls at Orchard Road and to baby showers and housewarming parties, and he's only 6 weeks old. Its generally difficult to bring such young babies out. Their needs are numerous and when they need something, they want it immediate. My baby cried so loudly in the MRT that we were terribly embarrassed.

Its NOT MORE DIFFICULT to bring breastfed babies out. All you need is a sling to sling your baby and a breastfeeding cover to cover him up as you feed him. Shopping will take a longer time though as you may need to find a nursing room or if there's none, you may need to find a quiet corner to sit down and feed baby. My friend has tried walking around shopping and breast-feeding baby discreetly in sling and breastfeeding cover so its not impossible! But I haven't tried that. My baby is so heavy and big... my shoulders will ache like crazy haha. But sometimes he like me to walk around as I feed him. If you don't have a sling, you can also just carry him and feed him under a cover. Some clothes are breastfeeding friendly and you can just pop baby under the cover of the blouse and feed.

Here's a picture of me wearing the sling on an MRT:

And here's a picture of me and my baby feeding under the breastfeeding cover:

You do need to have a change in wardrobe though. I have to give up many of my dresses and blouses and exchange them for blouses that have front open buttons to facilitate feeding.

There are a lot of nursing rooms in shopping malls in singapore. There's a list in this forum thread that you check before you go shopping. Some malls even offer free baby stroller loans.

Disclaimer: The above are personal opinions and preferences from my own experience and other mothers may have very different recommendations :)

I'll add to this FAQ as new questions pops up :)

Last edited 27 Nov 2011, 6.30pm

Baby feeds

I was so depressed yesterday evening that I called hubby and cried, telling him how our darling babe refused to wake up for feeds and drink so little when I put him to my breast.

When hubby came home, I was in tears and I cried as I ate my dinner. MIL and others saw and were concerned but they cannot be of any help. I need hubby to be there with me, sharing the pain and the worries.

Luckily, baby suddenly came alive in the evening. After changing diaper, baby fed 35min! He totally drained out the milk on one of my breasts! I gave him the other breast. He suckled for 5min and decided to call it a day. Hubby played with baby and I joined in the play, feeling so happy. I'm jealous of hubby. He loves his daddy and only behaves when daddy comes home. Yesterday, he was smiling and gaggling to hubby before he goes to work! But in the day when I try to wake him up, he just sleeps and sleeps like a koala.

As for night feeds, he had a good sleep after a hearty meal and woke me up at 2.30 with his cries. I can sense his impatience. I quickly pump out some milk to keep the aerola soft, picked up Yun Xuan and fed him. He's enjoying his feed very much. He drank a lot and then fell asleep. I'm so happy! After Yun Xuan went back to sleep in his cot, I kneeled down and gave my thanks to God. God blessed my little baby!

I'm happy when he feeds more and depressed when he feeds less or reject feeds. Sigh. My emotions are controlled by this little baby.

This morning, he woke up at 7am for his sun bath to prevent jaundice, and at 8am he is crying so hungrily for his feeds, he cannot play with his Papa before he goes to work. I fed him quite a lot too until he seems satisfied and then let him rest until his bath time.

Now baby Yun Xuan is lying down, and resting, fully awake after a good bath. But not hungry so I can't feed him. I had wanted to feed him after bath but he's too hungry before bath so I had to feed him before bath.

Hugs my dearest Yun Xuan baby. Everyday, we wait for daddy to come home to accompany us. It's really a torture doing confinement. The food is great coz my mother in law cooks very well but I can't shower and drink cold drinks in such hot weather. This is horrible. I switch on air con time and again to cool myself down. My MIL likes to swaddle Yun Xuan up and he's very red and hot after awhile because there isn't even fan blowing at him or air con! Back at our own home, I will keep baby cool with air con. If babies are swaddled too hot, they are at risk of Sudden Infant Death (SID).

20 more days to baby's full month! 2 more weeks and my confinement will be over. I can go wherever I want provided I can feed baby when he demands. Hugs dearest hubby and Yun Xuan. They are the most precious to me.

Baby Kieran Sia Yun Xuan is born on 10 Oct 2010!

My dearest baby Sia Yun Xuan Kieran is born on 10 Oct 2011. A wonderful date, isn't it?!

Haha.

The whole delivery process goes like this:

Early morning, hubby and I woke up for breakfast as usual. Rainy day and Hubby said rainy days are usually lucky days for him. He has a feeling something good will be happening today!

Hubby received call from the company he went for interview at and he was informed that he is offered a placement. He called me to talk about handing in his resignation and asked if there's any sign of labour yet. I said no. No bloody show, no nothing. I'm still at 38 weeks 4 days pregnant.

I went to take a short nap.

10.30am, while lying down on bed, resting, I heard, or rather felt a "pop" sound below, somewhere at my lower tummy. A few minutes later, I felt warm gush of fluid there, much like period coming.

Heart pounding, I rushed to the bathroom and saw my pantyliner stained with pinkish liquid. Washed and saw clear liquid with some blood stains flowing up continuously.

Called hubby and asked him whether he has tendered. He said yes. I told him water bag burst. He was shocked. I told him I was very frightened and nervous. He asked me not to be afraid and asked me to call my doctor and my dad immediately. Dad will come to drive me to hospital.

Dr Ho's clinic nurse asked me whether the flow of liquid is a lot. Its trickling but not a big gush. So I was advised to go to the clinic first. We did a fetal heartbeat test and Dr Ho checked the dilation. I was already 3cm dilated! I was like huh, 3cm and I felt no contraction?

He sent me to the labour ward. I didn't have anything except breakfast at 8am in the morning. Dr Ho said it's better not to eat anything in case an emergency surgery is necessary. When I'm in labour, I won't feel like eating anyway. A nurse in his office is so kind to give me a pack of biscuits. My parents, and hubby are with me. My parents in law are on their way. I couldn't believe it. My water bag broke at 10 Oct 2011, exactly the date I wish he will be born. My little angel!

I was so nervous when I went to the delivery ward. I was told to change into the hospital gown but leave the back unbuttoned in case I need epidural which needs to be injected to my spine. The nurses are so friendly and kindly answered my questions. Their calmness made me less nervous and afraid.

I'm so glad hubby is with me throughout the whole process. I am lucky to have such a loving and supportive husband.

The contraction was really painful. It started soon after I lie down on the bed with IVF inserted. I am relieved the anasthesist finally came and injected epidural. One painful insertion of the needle and one rather painful insertion of the catheter and then there's no more pain. I used the laughing gas because I thought it can help me alleviate the pain but the gas doesn't have much use. Gripping hard on the handle of the laughing gas pump helps though.

Then we waited another few more hours. Dr Ho came to check and said its still 3cm. My contraction isn't strong enough to dilate the cervix. He ordered the IVF medicine to be increased and within 1 hour, my cervix was dilated another 4 cm. Soon, the nurses came and said they want to prepare for delivery. Lucky that I used epidural. Hubby said the scale went really high up during peak of the contraction.

Then, I was 10cm dilated. Dr Ho came and told me he is going to deliver the baby now. He will use a vacuum but he still need me to push. I couldn't feel anything there after the epidural but the nurses and dearest hubby encouraged me to push when I should. I pushed not so hard at first. Then with their encouragement, I pushed harder and harder.

We heard baby's cry and there! My darling little angel Yun Xuan is born!

I immediately felt my stomach went "down" and the nurse put a crying little baby on the cloth on my chest. I was amazed and I really am not sure whether I should touch baby or hug him or what... My hubby is so brave! He watched the whole delivery process and see baby's head emerge from my vagina. He said baby came out facing side ways.

Then we watched and took photos of little Yun Xuan while doctor stitched me up. After that, Dr Ho informed me that I will feel pain a few hours later when the epidural wears off. Little did I know that the pain would be so intense that I couldn't sleep at all on day 1! Dr Ho came to check the stitches on the 2nd day and told me that besides the episiotomy, I also suffered a larger tear on the right side because my skin was too delicate. That explained the long time he took to stitch me up.

The lactation consultant came on the day after delivery to teach me breastfeeding but I couldn't do it well because the wound hurts so much! Most of my energy is gone to bearing the pain of the wound. I called hubby early on the day after the delivery to ask him to came to hospital quickly, I need him as I was feeling so extremely painful.

I love my little darling. He had jaundice on day 3 and his bilirubin level went up to level 14. So I stayed one more day to accompany him. I tried to breastfeed him as best as I can and to relieve his agony of taking off all his clothes and going under the phototherapy, I asked the nurses to feed him formula milk if he cried too hard. Then the next day, he level is 11.5 and the doctor said he can go home. Babies can go home if they are below level 10 but the doctor said he can go home but we must feed him well, make sure he passes urine and stool well and he has some sun bathing in the morning between 8-10am.

I really love my darling baby. Now, he is suffering because his bilirubin level is still high, he keeps sleeping and sleeping, not waking up every 2-3 hourly for feeds. My breasts are engoarged and I really really want to feed my little darling like I did in the hospital. I don't know what I should do. I'm at such a lost. I just want my little darling to get well as soon as possible. If he don't get enough breast milk, his bilirubin level will go up, and I can't bear my darling baby doing back to hospital again. If he needs to be admitted, what should I do?

He's not feeding well like other babies. He just kept sleeping. I'm useless at waking him up.

I was miserable that I was crying since this afternoon. Thinking of my little baby suffering makes me cry more and more. Other people around me showing concern made me cry even more! I just hope they would just leave me alone so that I can spend time with just me and my baby and I don't have to feel terrible with people disturbing me when I feed him and I don't have to bother with unwelcomed advices. I just want my hubby to be beside me, talking to me, reassuring me, caring for me and telling me baby and I are just going to be fine.

I hope everything goes well for my beloved and we can be happy again.

36 weeks and 4 days

Oh gosh! Baby is now hiccuping very violently inside me! I never like the feeling of baby hiccuping but at least it means our dear little one is learning to breath :)

Today is baby's 36 and 4th day since his conception. He is strong and tossing and turning, and kicking as he stretches inside me. I hope he remains so strong and not weaken in his movement like some babies do towards the end of preg when they get less space in the womb.

I just drank coconut juice bought from NTUC and had red and black bean soup on alternate days this week. The young coconut is supposed to help baby appear nicer with less blood streaks on his skin when he is born. The red bean soup and black bean soup helps in easing the water retention. I do feel that it's taking effect. My hands dun seem so swollen now.

Recently, I felt less breathless, and when I asked hubby, he said my tummy looks like it's lower. I guess baby has lightened! Unfortunately, I feel the urge to pee more often. Just now, I had to go to the washroom just 10 min after peeing, and I went about 4 times in an hour. In the middle night, I usually have to wake up 2-3 times to go washroom.

But I'm always always thirsty. If the craving for second trimester is food, the craving for late third trimester is liquid! I keep having to drink a lot. I hope that means I'm producing milk! My breasts feels tender, full and there's occasional tingling sensation at the nipples. These are exactly what the breastfeeding book describes. I'm glad I'm on track but some mothers are able to see colostrum (early milk) at this stage... I'm still not able to. I guess for first time moms, it's not easy for milk to come so easily. Some took 4 days after childbirth to produce milk. Lucky baby has fat reserves for 3 days after birth. I hope nobody will coerce me to feet infant formula, stating "not enough milk" as a reason! It's ridiculous how generations of infant formula marketing has successfully conned poor mothers into believing their own milk is inferior to something from animals and artificially produced from the lab. Do you know babies cannot take cow's milk and the scientists had to remove the fats and add in animal fats as replacement as this is easier for babies' digestion? Seriously, isn't it more intuitive and convenient to feed babies mothers' milk right from the breast? Not to mention the expensive infant formulas that we'll otherwise need to spend on. No animal in the animal kingdom is as troublesome as humans. Animal mothers take it as a natural instinct to breastfeed their babies. Only human beings need to go through buying the powdered milk, sterilizing the bottle, pouring warm water, cooling it, testing temperature, feeding baby with bottle, burbing baby coz when you use bottle, you introduce a lot of air (you do not need to burb a breastfeed baby because there is complete suction and thus no air introduced to baby), then putting baby to sleep and washing and sterilizing the bottle again. All these steps when actually all a mother need to do is to put baby to your breast and allow both to enjoy the unique bonding time.

I'm very thankful to my loving and supportive hubby. I am so touched when he searched YouTube for nappy folding techniques so he can help baby change nappy, accompanied me for every childbirth education course even though he needs to sacrifice work time and needs to work longer hours and put in extra effort on the following days, and read the Breastfeeding book we bought from Mt Alvernia by Sister Kang, so that he will understand more about breastfeeding and help me along when I need help.

Love hubby lots! Baby and I are fortunate :) No luxuries and material things in this world can be substitute for this love.

Although I still hope very much that we can get a car soon to help ferry baby around... I cannot imagine having to open and close baby pram while holding baby and carrying diaper bag when we go up and down a public transport. I really would just choose to stay home with baby. Unless baby needs to go out for vaccination which I guess we don't have a choice. Even now when I'm heavily pregnant, getting around without a car isn't easy. You don't always get nice ppl who give up seats and generally, the fast pace crowd at transport stations are a danger. Some people walk like zombies and some kids run around like the place is a park. Life sucks when you dun have a car. Sigh...

Updates and some thoughts

Just realized the stupid supposed to be cheaper AMK shop cheat my money. The pillow cost only $4.90 at NTUC, they charge $10.90! Grrr I'm seriously not going back there anymore.

Btw, add in baby thermometer to the to buy list.

Having a baby is so expensive! Haiz. I'm glad hubby forces us both to save up more since we decided to settle down. I'm happy that from wedding to buying first flat to baby, we use our own money and never had to borrow from anyone.

I remembered only drawing $80 from the bank last week and now, I have $0 in my wallet again. Groan... I really must save up much more and stop indulging in more expensive food and transport. But haiz, the hot weather really tempts me to take a cab instead of waiting for the bus and train.

Childbirth education at Mt Alvernia

Today, I went for the physiotherapy course at Mt Alvernia. It is part of the childbirth education workshop we signed up for. Today's lesson is great. The friendly physiotherapist taught us about positions and breathing techniques we should adopt during different stages of labour. I asked her about the pain where my uterus hit the ribs. She said it should not be due to the stomach muscles straining. It should be due to baby/uterus pressing on my ribs. I guess she's right because when I lie down or stretch that area, the pain lessens. When I lie on my left because I heard that lying on left is better for baby, the area hurts because its the left side that hurts. When I lie on my right, the pain goes away. So it must be the uterus pressure relieved from the ribs when I lie on my right. I asked her for any exercise to help. She said I just have to wait until the pressure is gone which means when baby is no longer applying pressure on the area. I guess when lightening (baby dropping lower down into the pelvic area) occurs, the area will be more relieved of pressure and of course pain. I will also do more stretching that the yoga teacher teaches. Helps in alleviating the pain too.

Myths about breastfeeding

I realized many people have lots of things to say about breastfeeding which may not be the best for mummy and baby. Mother in law's friend told her that I should start to massage and press on my nipples now until liquid appears at the milk duct holes on the aerola so as to prepare the breasts for breast-feeding later on. On the contrary, if I stimulate my breasts, it will cause contractions and subsequently, premature birth of baby. I have to clarify this to MIL!

The friend also told her that its good to feed baby with formula milk at night so that mummy can rest and not have to wake up to breastfeed. I firmly told MIL that I won't! Lucky I have a very understanding MIL who doesn't only listen to what her friend(s) advises. I told her I don't mind waking up every 2-3 hours to breastfeed as long as this ensures my baby gets total breast milk. Formula milk can never replace breast milk. I explained to her that if I supplement with formula milk, my milk supply will decrease, I may get engorgement if milk is not expressed and baby will be very full on formula milk to ask for more breast milk. Ultimately, my breastmilk production will decrease and there will be no more for baby. Personally, I will kill anyone who suggest I supplement or replace with formula milk. I hope the nurse at Mt Alvernia will understand and bring baby to me for breastfeeding right after delivery and cleaning up. I heard that if baby is breastfed within 24hrs, he tends to remember the sucking action better and will latch on better.

MIL say baby needs water. But a baby on total breastfeed does not need water. Oh well, I told her a little bit is ok but when I bring baby home, I won't feed him any water. Feeding water to baby will cause him to feel artificially full and he won't be sucking breast milk and thus, won't get enough nutrients. I hope she won't keep thinking of giving baby water every time she feels he needs to. Baby's stomach is different from adult's. We are thirsty and requires water often doesn't mean baby needs water too.

I forgot to tell MIL that I intend to not breastfeed on schedule but on demand. That's why hubby and I bought a baby cot cum play pen for him to sleep in so that I can feed him while resting in the day or at night, whenever he wants to. Its too tiring to get out of bed and stoop down to hold baby up and breastfeed if he sleeps on mattress on the floor.

Yao lan causes brain damage?

MIL and my mom also heard from friends and TV programmes that if baby sleep in Yao Lan, baby will get brain damage. I would like to say that I won't rock baby like he's in a roller coaster, and I won't be letting him sleep in Yao Lan all night. Baby will ultimately still be sleeping on mattress. The Yao Lan is only for afternoon naps, or drinking milk/water from bottles when he is much older. So he won't get excessive rocking and he won't be brain damaged. Seriously, all 3 of us, my sisters and I slept in Yao Lan and we are all graduates. What brain damage?! I do agree that we cannot let baby sleep in Yao lan and rock him all night with the motor rocker. But I dun think people do that really. My parents never do that. Yao lan is only for day time naps. The cot, also, will only be a temporary measure because baby outgrows cot very fast. Its only for my convenience when I do breastfeeding for first 6 months. When baby is 6 months old, he can learn to eat solids already and dun have to breastfeed so often in the middle of the night.

Worries and fears

I really hope I can be a good mother to my baby. I am such an opinionated person... the inconvenience of confinement also will make me quick tempered... I'm the kind who will snap at people if I feel hot and sticky. So, I hope no unhappiness with happen during my confinement, especially since I'm doing confinement at parents in law's house. Sigh. Not the perfect option for me. I wish I dun have to do confinement because I like to be in control and during confinement, everyone will insists I rest and that means I can't be in control. Grrr... ok, I need to learn to relax... I dun think I'll ever leave my baby's side! Can't imagine I'm expected to rest at another room while MIL sleep with baby at another room. True that confinement is a time for mothers to rest after delivery but I think I'll hope it will end soon and I can bring baby home, and be in control of everything all over again. I seriously think I am at risk of post-natal blues or anxiety or something like that.

P/S: Two incidences that proves pregnant women's brain turn to jelly during pregnancy:

1. I forgot to take money from ATM after withdrawing. Lucky I remembered to take my card.

2. I was typing this post and when I wanted to type "course" I typed "cause", thought it was wrong spelling, deleted and suddenly forgot how to spell "course" until much later... -.-"

Busy preparation

Baby is 25 weeks today. 6 months old.
Dr Ho say he is about 683g. I wonder how they calculate with just the ultrasound scan machine alone.
So far I only gain 2kg for the entire 6 months. But lucky baby's weight is normal. That means I've slimmed down a lot.

Today, I don't feel very good at all. Yesterday morning, I'm able to wake up early, prepare breakfast for hubby and walk long distance for my tao huay and da bao vegetarian bee hoon for lunch.

But today, I could only lie on bed and feel really groggy. Couldn't prepare breakfast. Lucky we bought swissroll and it doesn't need much preparation.

I was really stressed up today, feeling bouts of frustration ever since morning, but for no good reason. Perhaps because of the hot weather, perhaps because I called up to book the breastfeeding lesson and learned that I've missed the previous 2 lessons last week. Anyway, I wasn't free last week. Then I have to reschedule meeting up with friends, and reschedule meeting with contractor for my new home just to attend the breastfeeding lesson.

I booked the lesson through this Breastfeeding mothers' support group website but after calling and emailing them, they have yet to give me a confirmation yet. Haiz.

I also found that the yoga lesson at Motherandchild has no vacancy this Fri so I scheduled one on next Fri. There is only 1 vacancy but I'm going with a friend so they changed it to the following Fri but they'll call me up if there's enough vacancy for me and my friend on next Fri.

I also booked my post-natal Malay massage lady. $70 per session for 7 days... She's recommended as reliable and nice in mummysg forum so hopefully she's good. I'm still considering whether to engage her for pre-natal massage for $75 per session too. Maybe later on.

Time is a precious scarcity and everyday, there are so much things to do and so little time.

I really would like to enjoy swimming and to go shopping for my mummy and baby essentials. I have a list to buy... Friend gave me a list of must-buy or must-prepare stuff to pack into bags before baby's arrival.

It seems that time flies and I'm already left with 4 months to Baby's arrival!

Its now time for me to bath and get something to eat, and go to parents' place. I always believe happiness is a choice and we are in charge of our own happiness, and now that perhaps hormonal changes or whatever it is is making me feel frustrated, I have to do something to cheer myself up :)